I’m a Blonde, Too – Sorta…

The Diet

    A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. “I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least five pounds.”
    When the blonde returns, she’s lost nearly 20 pounds. “Why, that’s amazing!” the doctor says. “Did you follow my instructions?”
    The blonde nods. “I’ll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day.”
    “From hunger, you mean?” asked the doctor.
    “No, from skipping.”

This is an old joke but it still makes me smile. We have a tendency to listen to people in authority without asking questions sometimes. The best question to ask a doctor is, “Why?” I know I want to find out why something is happening to me or why I have to see another specialist or why I have to journal all my food or why I need a different medication or any meds at all. (I’m not allowed to call them drugs. My kids think that would sound too BAD!)

Do you go to your doctor with a list of questions? How about your nutritionist or trainer? Do you even know what your adductor does? (Insert large shrug, here!) I’m sitting at my kitchen table, drinking some pretty good black coffee and thinking that I need some answers. I know answers won’t solve my problems and issues. So, what is the difference between a problem and an issue? Is this one of life’s great mysteries or just the spin on a thing?

Bubbles - Power Puff Girl!

I need help! I’m going to call on Bubbles! She’s one of the Power Puff Girls but since I’m playing my blonde card today, I’ll pick her to kick ass for me. I can’t skip rope or meals but I can skip the “Poor Me!” crap. Of course, calling on a cartoon character to kick ass for me is a little desperate but it allows me to think outside of my comfort zone. I can kick ass. I can do this with all my “problems” and “issues”. I will deal with each item on my list with either an action or a question for which I WILL get an answer. I may not like the answer but I’ll deal with it. My littlest brother once told me (he’s the one with the biological research background) that managing weight is very simple. Energy in – energy out. If you want to lose weight you have to burn more energy  than you take in (body energy is actually measured in calories). Sigh! So simple.

So back to listening to authority – if it sounds weird, question it. If you don’t understand, ask questions. If it sounds unfair, ask why. “Because I said so!” only works for Mom! And never skip meals! They come back to haunt you with more calories!

Thanks for listening! ;D Diane

~ by 1fatgirlshrinking - Diane Kirby on April 1, 2012.

One Response to “I’m a Blonde, Too – Sorta…”

  1. You’re right, I just nod in a yes doc style & do what the say. Weird! Also, I don’t say drugs and use meds as the word drug always has the association with the illegal kind.

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